Tags
Spring has sprung.
Happy Autumn to all my friends south of the Equator.
Good morning, all.
20 Monday Mar 2017
Posted in Other Columns
≈ Comments Off on Spring 2017
Tags
Spring has sprung.
Happy Autumn to all my friends south of the Equator.
Good morning, all.
19 Sunday Mar 2017
Posted in Other Columns
Spring is about to spring. And that means the young lovelies will be out in force. If you’re in the big Gulf Coast Mecca of fun, I have a few places to check out for the checking out. These are presented in no particular order. And, yes, this is a “bad” Perrin posting…
Ten. Davidoff Super Store
Boy Scout Road, across from International. The best times for watching (and playing) are Thursday, Friday, and Saturdays after 11 PM. They eat at the foo foo places in the vicinity and then saunter over. ALWAYS a good time! Even if it’s not prime time, 2 million+ cigars in stock are worth the trip. *Note: the bar and wait staff, after 11 AM, are awesome. Sometimes there are special events with special ladies. The nights are girl-friendly happy hours. **Note: In the days, at the bar, enjoy yourselves, but know that if you rub the hostesses the wrong way, Ed, Mark, Yours Truly, and 15 other dedicated “regulars’ will stomp your a$$.

Anytime really…
Nine. Publix
Seriously. Publix supermarkets. Any one. I especially like the ones on Dale Mabry. Any time is good though after 4 PM seems to be prime time. Fresh Market on Henderson has also been known to attract a bevy…
Eight. Bayshore
Any day of the year. Any time of day. A week or so back I attempted to bike from Downtown to Ballast Point. I remember little aside from the bouncing happiness…
Seven. Gandy Bridge Beach
I have never stopped on the route – a few miles across the Bay. Glancing from side to side I see nothing but bikinis between the mangroves and 4X4s. A microcosmic “Redneck Riviera”. And the Gandy-686-688 corridor leads too…
Six. Indian Rocks Beach
All the beaches are great; I just love this one. I recommend the area from 12th Ave. to the big, public parking … park, north of 688 on 699. Again, it’s any day, any time, any time of year. Lulu’s and Crabby Bill’s also provide a good experience (with excellent food and drinks).

Yeah. A covert “selfie” works sometimes…
Five. LA Fitness
I really hate the place. They “want me back” and I don’t care. Bad service, Guidos, and assorted trash – not working out but loudly taking up space. Of course, there are an abundance of gym bunnies hopping around. And, of course, I speak of the Signature Club on S. D.M. Hwy.
Four. Downtown
I especially hate downtown. Not just in this city. Any downtown, other than Boston or NYC after midnight, sucks. Still, if one ventures into one of the many crowded bars in the area between the canal/little Bay and Ybor, expect to be entertained. This also applies to Channelside and SOHO (which, IMHO, really sucks)…
Three. Da Clubs
Okay. If you’re desperate, lazy, bored, or low “game”, then there is always the consistency of Mons or THEE Doll House, etc. There’s a system of how these places work; don’t be a fool, unless you have money to burn and loads of time to waste. *Note: Tarot cards, shiny objects, and other trivial BS go a long way towards attracting the native working girls.
Two. International Mall
All the malls really… Westshore, and especially the International, bring them out. 24/7 – as long as the place is open – it’s wall-to-wall women. Seriously, it is nothing but (90%) hotties, (9.9%) dandy fags, and men like me (usually being led around by a woman or a gaggle of spend-happy teenage girls). Best area is the food court, the tables by the restaurants, perhaps centered up around the Japanese place.
One. Everywhere else
Anywhere else. It’s all good territory. I just learned that Hillsborough and Pinellas Counties have ordinances against fat and/or unattractive women.
Happy hunting. You can thank me later. The political madness and cigar mania will resume tomorrow.
17 Friday Mar 2017
Posted in Other Columns, Uncategorized
≈ Comments Off on Fred on Family (His) and Society (Ours)
Tags
This is a must read for the Anglophiles.
Fred Reed, in one essay, explains both his family tree and the precipitous decline of a civilization.
We were part of a thing brief but of immense value. The literacy, the attention to language, was of one cloth with that of the English, whose mastery has never been equaled and seldom approached. It has lasted in the family. In evenings with my grandfather at Hampden-Sydney, a parlor game was to call out three numbers–“746, 2, 7”–page 746, column 2, seventh entry of a huge dictionary on onion-skin paper–whereupon the caller-out had to spell the word, define it, pronounce it correctly, and give the etymology.
Tidewater was in the current of the English stretching from at least Sir Philip Sydney through Lewis Carol, Milne, Galsworthy, Kipling, Tolkien, Churchill and a hundred others. A thousand others. This virtuosity is now lost beyond redemption as American society, once determined from the top down, has come to be determined from the bottom up. Can you imagine an American politician writing—well, anything literate, but especially the equal of Churchill’s A History of the English Speaking People?
But we were speaking of the curious continuity of families. Come the war, Charles Scott Venable served on Lee’s staff, and Andrew Reid Venable on Jeb Stuart’s. This was a continuation of the aristocratic sense of duty. Their country was being invaded by alien people and they, like Lee, like Jackson, determined to defend it. Both were graduates of Hampden-Sydney, as am I, as were my father and uncle.
After the war Charles Venable was an astronomer and professor of mathematics at the University of Virginia. My grandfather processed mathematics at Hampden-Sydney and served as dean. My paternal uncle passed the bar but chose journalism, my father being a mathematician. I am whatever I am–for years I worked my way through math texts because I liked them–and my daughters are, aside from being smart, a musician and an artist. One of them popped ninety-ninth percentile in math on some standardized test and was invited to attend a math camp. A weird continuity.
America is not, or was not, ever, a “nation of immigrants”, a “proposition nation”. Ronald Reagan and a thousand shrieking loony liberals and cuck apologists aside, this country was an extension of Old England. Until the early 1800s, this was a land of the English. For another 100 years or so it was a land of the English and those of European descent who closely approximated the English tradition and experience. It is only since 1966 that the character has changed. And the change is noticeable.
I have seen, firsthand, the change and decline. The Lovetts came to America in two waves. One assigned to New England and the Puritan settlements. The other, my closest kin, like Fred’s people, settled in Virginia. Unlike his folks, mine departed South for the Carolinas and Georgia.
My family history (much of it) strangely tracks that path Fred lays out, from at least 1066 and on-wards. It ends with me and my daughter in the 21st Century. My little girl was born into a society which somewhat resembled the one I witnessed in the 70’s and 80’s – a little.

I saw the changes as they unfolded. I would like to go back. Whether that is possible remains to be seen. If it is not, then damn it. All of it.
17 Friday Mar 2017
Posted in Other Columns
≈ Comments Off on Happy Saint Patrick’s Day 2017!
I sincerely hope you’ll all be down by the river swilling that green beer today. Go ahead. I can manage the traffic-free roads in the hinterland.

Saint Patrick was born a Roman citizen in Britain. At age 16 he was kidnapped and enslaved in Ireland. He suffered his bondage for six years before escaping back to his home. Later, as a priest and a bishop, he returned to Ireland as a missionary of the Church. This in itself is a miracle I think.
Have a great, greenish day!
13 Monday Mar 2017
Posted in Other Columns
Back at the Southern Command Center.
Today, about to fire up another Gurkha Cellar Reserve 18-Year. A must smoke by anybody’s reckoning.

Really the perfect accompaniment for the perfect “work” setting. (Can’t believe I get paid to do this…).
The company isn’t bad either.

Leah tolerates Yours Truly…
13 Monday Mar 2017
Posted in Other Columns
≈ Comments Off on The Benefit of the Doubt in Tesla City
Tags
Somewhere in here, maybe more than once, I’ve knocked self-driving autos, computers, and technology. I’ve noted Telsa’s reliability in their current Crash-mobiles.
Still, I’ve noticed an inordinate number of Teslas buzzing around Tampa. There’s something like 1 in every 40 cars or a whole lot, whichever is more. That, and there’s quite a few Maseratis down here.
Anyway, I have observed these electro-cars in action and I read the local news. For all that daily operation I’ve yet to see or hear of a crash. Maybe, just maybe, it’s a sound concept. I feel generous today. (Could be the coffee talking).
And the things seem peppy. Direct electric drive does offer superior torque to the average gas engine. The thing that holds them back is the range. I suppose commuting around SOHO, Palma Ceia, and downtown is well within the capability.
As far as the power thing goes, the largest and heaviest off-road trucks utilize a dual diesel-electric system (yes, giant 400-ton hybrids) with an electric motor mounted behind each wheel(s).
There’s all that to ponder. And this lovely picture:

Morning.
09 Thursday Mar 2017
Posted in Other Columns, Uncategorized
≈ Comments Off on Surprises on the Road
Wow. What a day! Took the show on the road again today around 4 AM.
1) The traffic report:
I-20, I-95, I-10, I-75, all U.S. Highways, and all side roads are all in terrible shape. Every single mile is under construction, blocked with clover wrecks, and prowled by the Po-Po. Abandon all hope. Stay home.
2) “Check Engine”. On a 500-mile trip! Awesome. I did, she looked fine – if a little dusty.
3) Got into the Southern Command and discovered my auto-post selections from last night did not work. Thanks, Word Press! Now I look as drunk as the Russian with the magic nuclear moles….
All better now.

The Davidoff Effect makes everything okay!
08 Wednesday Mar 2017
Posted in Other Columns
A Gallop-Healthways Survey reveals America’s most and least healthy places to live. Naples, FL, took the top spot, followed by Barnstable, MA – terrific places, both. One is a little chilly, the other balmy, both are near the sea.
![]()
Healthways.
The study indexed 189 communities across the country based on a few key factors: purpose, social, financial, community and physical.
These rankings are, surprisingly, somewhat different than those I reported on last month.
Check the results and see where your town falls.
07 Tuesday Mar 2017
Posted in News and Notes, Other Columns
Tags
I repeat do Not mess with Ivan Throne. The author of The Nine Laws (which you should buy, now) is not to be trifled with. Watch the following video. Pay close attention around 00:55.
Ha! Ha! Ha! Take that commie scum!
One will note that at or around 00:55, one of the black-clad, communist, neo-hippie “protesters” deliberately drops a black flag into Ivan’s face. This constitutes simple battery under CO law. The police are right there yet they do nothing. They cannot in these situations. Their primary job is to preserve overall order and to defend the given location – in this case the Colorado State Capitol.
The unwashed destroyers get used to this immunity. They act on it, smug and secure from arrest and consequence. They also know most “normal” people won’t or can’t do anything to stop them.
Ivan isn’t “normal”.
Ivan is a legitimate, trained, practicing Ninja.

He makes mention of that fact, casually, in The Nine Laws. I read his book and raved about it. Still, I calculate. While his insights lend credence to everything the man says, in the back of my mind something subtely questioned the Ninjitsu claims.
I have nearly 30 years of experience in Tae Kwon Do, Karate, boxing, kick-boxing, and various combatives. I can generally tell when someone is BS-ing. Nothing Ivan ever wrote caused me definitive doubt. But, still, I have never seen him inaction nor seen any authority or documentation.
I, now, have no doubts whatsoever. His smooth, powerful, and effortless sweep was the result of professional training and extreme skill. He whipped the flag down, yanked it away (with strength and authority), and handed it off to a cop – all in one instant movement. And he never broke his concentration on the larger event. Also, he only did what was necessary to break the attack; there was no need to follow-up retaliatory action. (Which I know he could have delivered with instant devastation). That was amazing.
This movement was almost too fast to see. Watch again if you have to.
One also notes that, confronted with that level of force, the Antifa scum did … absolutely nothing! Those fools, not quite as stupid as they might seem, knew immediately they were in the presence of something beyond their feeble control.
Ivan shattered their immunity and their smugness. They did not escalate and they did not dare repeat their mistake. Some likely didn’t have time to notice. They went on with … whatever the hell uselessness they were doing.
Two tried to burn small “Trump” flags. Much like the 2016, anti-Trump, anti-white “protest” in Athens, GA, this gesture was beyond pathetic. What kind of protester can’t properly burn a flag?! I am ashamed of my dear leftists.
Do mind that these losers were not the worst the left has to offer. They were not nearly as dangerous as some. They were: few in number, utterly inept, out in daylight, and right in front of a line of officers. A different crowd, at night, could be considerably more worrisome.
However, take this lesson to heart: never give in! Do not, under any circumstances, be intimidated by bullies, thugs, and idiots. The slightest and swiftest resistance defeats them. Always.
Many, many thanks to Ivan for this demonstration. If you don’t follow The Dark Triad Man, you should.
If you’ll excuse me, I need to watch the video once more. I need a good laugh.
06 Monday Mar 2017
Posted in Other Columns
Sitting around in a dark stupor of legislative reform I drifted off into a pleasant dream, a remembrance of a different time. An age ago, or so it now seems, I stumbled across a cigar of uncommon qualities.
**Yes. This is another trip in Perrin’s fuzzy-details time machine…**
Let’s say it was the week around Christmas, 2006 – that sounds about right. Give or take a year and the accuracy is impeccable. Hell, I was there; how am I suppose to recall anything everything?
Anyways, I was at the old beach compound. It was evening. That! I remember. Dark outside. Later too; the youngins were pretty much all tucked away in bed. The rest of the horde was scattered here and yon by television and wine rack. I procured a lantern and ventured onto the front porch.
Behind the screens my little flame danced and flickered in the constant salty breeze. A melody of shifting airs, none too cool, and crashing waves provided the ambiance for my experiment. Or, was it an experience? Huh…
In the near dark I perched in an old rocking chair. A sturdy ale by my side – we’ll say it was S. Smith’s Imperial – I pondered my evening smoke. Back then I was new to the sport and given to trying any and everything. My palate had yet to fully develop. This, I know, may skew my memories. What was fun or all I could handle back then might, now, be passe.
At any rate, THEN, my choice was interesting and excellent (so I thought at the time). Out of my small travel humidor, which I have since misplaced (with a great many other things – like old beach compounds…), I pulled a Gordo-ish, 6X60 beauty. She was dark and fragrant. It was a Bucanero Canon Cubano Maduro. A cannon of a canon.

Courtesy of Bucanero.
In those days I had little idea of what, exactly, went into a stick. However, based on my research, just now, I can authoritatively say the wrapper is or was a strong Nicaraguan Habano, the dual filler is from Nica and the D.R. The binder remains a mystery product! Bucanero claims it to be on the “Light side of Full Body” with “Complex flavors”. That seems about right. Honestly, I can’t recall the exact notes. I’ll settle for their stock description: “rich creamy flavor with complex cocoa, espresso and assorted subtle spices”.
That seems about right. Patrick A. from Stogie Guys said, in 2008:
Big, black, and bold, this five and ½ inch by 60 ring gauge Bucanero behemoth packs rich, textured flavors of dark chocolate and burning timber. The Nicaraguan, Honduran, Italian, and Costa Rican blend is full-bodied and well-balanced. With decent construction – including a fairly even burn for its large girth – I can recommend this at $7 a pop.
Right, again. I picked his short review because of the close temporal proximity to my memory. His $7 price seems about right too. The chocolate I could see. The timber would be surprising. If I can muster anything from the memory banks, it would be earthiness (from Nica) along with the cocoa and light spices. I find his addition of Honduras, Italy, and Costa Rica interesting as well. Perhaps the blend has changed?
Back to what I can directly recall – this was a damned fine smoke! Seems that it took me around a good two hours. I would have gone slower, then, in fear of being overpowered. And, as I recall, that nearly happened. By the time I finished I was dizzy. This was a combined effect of the ale and the “light side of full body”. However, it was a happy dizzy. It was balanced perfectly on the knife’s edge. Any more and I might have been ill. Any less and I might not be typing this. In short, it was a blissful experience.
It’s one I’d rather like to repeat. Of course, as I mentioned above, a re-creation might be impossible a decade later. Too much smoke under the bridge perhaps. Still, it would be interesting. And difficult.
All of the shops I now generally frequent have stopped carrying Bucaneros. Back then they usually had two facings in stock: my Canon and the more popular Full Sail. There are a few I can think to check without going overly out of my way and without resort to on-line ordering and the mercy of UPS. I’ll do a little pavement pounding in FLA and report back if I strike tobacco gold.
The conditions may not be replicable. However, I’ve tried to rebuild the legend in my mind tonight. And I hope you enjoyed the trip.
You must be logged in to post a comment.