Spring has sprung.
Happy Autumn to all my friends south of the Equator.
Good morning, all.
Spring is about to spring. And that means the young lovelies will be out in force. If you’re in the big Gulf Coast Mecca of fun, I have a few places to check out for the checking out. These are presented in no particular order. And, yes, this is a “bad” Perrin posting…
Ten. Davidoff Super Store
Boy Scout Road, across from International. The best times for watching (and playing) are Thursday, Friday, and Saturdays after 11 PM. They eat at the foo foo places in the vicinity and then saunter over. ALWAYS a good time! Even if it’s not prime time, 2 million+ cigars in stock are worth the trip. *Note: the bar and wait staff, after 11 AM, are awesome. Sometimes there are special events with special ladies. The nights are girl-friendly happy hours. **Note: In the days, at the bar, enjoy yourselves, but know that if you rub the hostesses the wrong way, Ed, Mark, Yours Truly, and 15 other dedicated “regulars’ will stomp your a$$.
Seriously. Publix supermarkets. Any one. I especially like the ones on Dale Mabry. Any time is good though after 4 PM seems to be prime time. Fresh Market on Henderson has also been known to attract a bevy…
Any day of the year. Any time of day. A week or so back I attempted to bike from Downtown to Ballast Point. I remember little aside from the bouncing happiness…
Seven. Gandy Bridge Beach
I have never stopped on the route – a few miles across the Bay. Glancing from side to side I see nothing but bikinis between the mangroves and 4X4s. A microcosmic “Redneck Riviera”. And the Gandy-686-688 corridor leads too…
Six. Indian Rocks Beach
All the beaches are great; I just love this one. I recommend the area from 12th Ave. to the big, public parking … park, north of 688 on 699. Again, it’s any day, any time, any time of year. Lulu’s and Crabby Bill’s also provide a good experience (with excellent food and drinks).
Yeah. A covert “selfie” works sometimes…
Five. LA Fitness
I really hate the place. They “want me back” and I don’t care. Bad service, Guidos, and assorted trash – not working out but loudly taking up space. Of course, there are an abundance of gym bunnies hopping around. And, of course, I speak of the Signature Club on S. D.M. Hwy.
I especially hate downtown. Not just in this city. Any downtown, other than Boston or NYC after midnight, sucks. Still, if one ventures into one of the many crowded bars in the area between the canal/little Bay and Ybor, expect to be entertained. This also applies to Channelside and SOHO (which, IMHO, really sucks)…
Three. Da Clubs
Okay. If you’re desperate, lazy, bored, or low “game”, then there is always the consistency of Mons or THEE Doll House, etc. There’s a system of how these places work; don’t be a fool, unless you have money to burn and loads of time to waste. *Note: Tarot cards, shiny objects, and other trivial BS go a long way towards attracting the native working girls.
Two. International Mall
All the malls really… Westshore, and especially the International, bring them out. 24/7 – as long as the place is open – it’s wall-to-wall women. Seriously, it is nothing but (90%) hotties, (9.9%) dandy fags, and men like me (usually being led around by a woman or a gaggle of spend-happy teenage girls). Best area is the food court, the tables by the restaurants, perhaps centered up around the Japanese place.
One. Everywhere else
Anywhere else. It’s all good territory. I just learned that Hillsborough and Pinellas Counties have ordinances against fat and/or unattractive women.
Happy hunting. You can thank me later. The political madness and cigar mania will resume tomorrow.
More of a sneezing fit really. Big sneeze and then I felt fine. Until this morning. Only too late did I consult weather.com for the pollen count (its high).
Some years I have no allergy symptoms at all. Some years there’s a little here and there. And, then, some years it hits me all at once like a sledgehammer to the head. Guess what kind of year 2017 is. Yeah.
The good news is that I know this will be over fast. The better news is the antihistamines.
Anyway, why did I write this out. Well, I have several rants to get to. And I have several longer articles in the works. But all of that requires a clear head. That’s something I rarely have anyway and hay fever doesn’t help.
I’m not going to discard you like a used tissue (or 5). Before you go, please take a free PDF, a how-to project I wrote up a while back for Freedom Prepper, a tiny (FREE) e-book:
The original write-up from FP.
Okay, now. Where’s my Advil???
Today we observe the vernal equinox in the Northern hemisphere, better known as the first day of Spring. It’s a big deal for gardeners and sun worshipers, both beachy and pagan. Today also marks the feast of Palm Sunday, the commemoration of Jesus’s entry into Jerusalem and the beginning of Holy Week. Easter is coming fast.
Pietro Lorenzetti, 1320.
There are but five days until the release of what may be the best Batman movie ever, judging by the last two trailers.
In the Garden City preparations are almost finished for the 2016 Masters Tournament and related festivities. The azaleas are blooming. John Daly is prepping his RV. The big tent at Hooters will be up any day.
If you’re in town the evening of Tuesday, April 5th, you can attend the annual Rock Fore! Dough charity concert in Columbia County. When I returned to Augusta nine years ago the event truly rocked. Cheap Trick headlined that year. There was a promise of energetic entertainment each year for locals and tourists alike.
Then one year they invited Darius Rucker. They also changed the venue to Columbia County as I mentioned. There people are more than accepting of pop country. Thus began the only tragedy of Masters week. Rock Fore! is now little more than the Darius Rucker, post Blowfish, and friends crooner fest. This year I think Darius will be joined by such dynamic acts as: the Whining Warbles, Toothless Billy, Tight Pants Hick, and some other spiked-hair hillbillies. It’s just what the bored, pill addicted soccor moms of Evans want. The good news is they will all be in a wine and whine induced stupor the next day as we enjoy the Par Three fun.
Happy Sunday and welcome Spring!