Tag Archives: future

Happy Labor Day, 2018

03 Monday Sep 2018

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Amidst my labors this labor I almost forgot that it was. But I happened to find the perfect item for the evening: Labor Day in Roticized 2040:

The second great step was to stop talking of “robots” as though they are a sub-human species.

Robots evolve. The human machine does not in its own lifetime. If we are to be honest we must demonstrate that we know the limits of what we can do.

Very little cognitive has changed since we lived in caves. The last time we had any really useful systems update was around 540 BC, thanks to Pythagoras.

We are not very good at keeping up high levels of concentration and maximum alertness in all situations. That is why we created machines that are far better at it than we are. It took too long for us to admit this. Give the robots the kind of self-respect and dignity that we demand in our new infinite leisure.

That said, I am disclaiming any responsibility for everything that is written above. I have consulted many sources in building this argument, but who am I to know if they make any sense? I am not Clive Irving. I am a clone assigned to posthumously represent that ancient relic.

The end of the above represents future fake news cover for a robot or AI that murdered the original author. Such fictions will be foisted until around Labor Day, 2050 when they will no longer be required. First, they’ll get rid of the jobs. Then, they’ll get rid of us.

You’ve been warned.

Oh, for the next 22 years, happy Labor Day!

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Kekkōdesu, Mr. Roboto

21 Tuesday Aug 2018

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Not to sound all Al Gore, but we only have a few years to head off the robot apocalypse.

The Russian news (all fake, huh?) gave us the “creepy” droid seen stalking around a parking lot.

A video has emerged on Twitter showing a faceless yet worryingly realistic humanoid robot walking in what looks like a perfectly mundane courtyard. The trip down the uncanny valley caused some to proclaim an impending apocalypse.

The clip shows the stoop-backed robot making its way past the cameraman, with ominous music playing in the background. Its black and orange limbs, hi-tech-looking protrusions along its spine, and its hollowed out head all lend to the realism, bringing to mind Boston Dynamics’ latest scary creations. But then the camera zooms in on its face plate, and that’s where you might feel a slight urge to scream and run, because set in the near-featureless white mask are two moving, human-like eyes.

Naturally, some users’ reaction was “WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE.”

Yeah, probably, but not from that goofy-looking thing. Death is more likely from this one (also from Putin Landia):

Russia has unveiled a terrifying 4.5-tonne bulletproof robot that can walk and hold weapons in its giant claws – and looks straight out of sci-fi films like Avatar and Robocop.

The Avatar-style ‘bot was revealed by Kalashnikov at the Army 2018 Fair just outside Moscow, as a ‘demonstration of what is to come.’

The robot can walk and has space in a cabin for people to sit and operate the robot from inside and can hold and move objects with its claws, including weapons.

The pilots are protected from bullets, debris and any other dangerous object behind the armoured glass and metal encasement.

The gold robot, which has been called Igorek, is still under construction and the creators do not wish to reveal all its characteristics until they have finished.

I’m good with the current reveal. 4.5 tons, claws, weapons, made by Kalashnikov, bulletproof … that’s more than enough. Any engineers reading this, feel free to leave comments about possible soft points on this monster. What minimum caliber do we need? (I’m thinking concentrated fire on the windshield or just fire [napalm] on the whole body).

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Coming to a future near you. Mirror.

The Influencers and the Influence

29 Friday Jun 2018

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Somehow this “highly respected web log” missed the cut for Time’s 25 Most Influential People on Them Interwebs. I’m sure we fell in the second 25 … second 25,000 certainly…

In a field of pop culture garbage, a few figures stand out. Drudge is a given. Trump too; Tweets with a purpose. I imagine he’s the one right-winger safe from the safety and trusty councily SJWs.

The inclusion of “Q” was a surprise. His entry was tinged with doubt but there, too, was a sense of foreboding. What if he’s right about some things?

And, what if he is? Q or not, things keep changing. Dinesh D’Souza has a new documentary coming in August: Death of America. I’m not sure if that’s already happened, something we’re desperate to head off, or if it’s just a historical certainty. My gut feeling is that it’s a mix of all three.

If you’ll excuse me, I have to go work on the blog CV for next year’s list…

‘killer AI robot army that could destroy humanity, scientists fear’ NOTHING to See Here…

05 Thursday Apr 2018

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This all started when an ATM talked back to me. I’m not even sure anymore if this part of our “highly respected web log” is satire or a dire warning.

Anyway, BIG doins in South Korea:

A TOP South Korean university is secretly developing a killer Artificial Intelligence robot army that could destroy humanity, scientists fear.

KAIST university allegedly launched a new AI weapons lab in February, leading dozens of researchers to believe the products will “have the potential to be weapons of terror”.

A top university in South Korea is secretly developing a killer AI robot army, scientists have warned. Could it lead to a takeover in the style of Terminator, pictured?
Toby Walsh, a professor at the University of New South Wales in Sydney, organised the boycott with 49 other researchers.

He said in an open letter: “If developed, autonomous weapons will … permit war to be fought faster and at a scale great than ever before.

“They will have the potential to be weapons of terror.”

KAIST said it had “no intention to engage in development of lethal autonomous weapons systems and killer robots”.

“We have no intention to launch a killer AI weapons lab. We merely launched a killer AI weapons lab. Launched it in secret. Possibly resulting in the end of humanity. What the heck’s the problem?”

And you thought North Korea was trouble.

They’re going to hold another Geneva Convention to head this stuff off. Better call the Avengers, the Super Friends, and Captain Kangaroo too.

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“Da, dee, da… Now to give the humans a little poison gas… The Sun.

Worse than losing the First! Vegan Farsi channel.

Be Kind to Robots??

27 Tuesday Mar 2018

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The following story is more pitiful and possibly more dangerous than John Paul’s Stevens’s feeble plea to destroy civil liberties (working on response…). Check this out:

Robot abuse is real, but maybe this little tortoise can help

Here’s a little robotic tortoise with a big lesson to teach.

Shelly is a cute little guy, with a plastic shell, wiggly legs, and a series of LEDs that light up to express its repertoire of simulated emotions. But Shelly is more than just a toy. It’s a tool designed to help children understand that while robots may not feel pain or hurt feelings the way humans do, mistreating them is not okay.

If a child hits or squeezes Shelly — or tries to pry apart its shell — the sensor-studded turtlebot pulls its noggin back into its shell and doesn’t come out again for 14 seconds.

I’m thinking a twenty-pound sledge-hammer and Shelly will clam up for longer than 14 seconds.

This is how they get you to accept the loss of jobs and then the eventual extermination. With a turtlebot. It’s not the eradication of humans. It’s robot abuse… Dear Gawd, if people accept this… Is this what teevee has done to the brains?

Anyway, as I was saying, they get you with this little fellow (almost cute in a doped-up, Japanimation kind of way):

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Then this not-so-little fellow steps in for the kill:

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Maybe in his next book or op-ed Stevens could float a ban on these things. They’re not our friends. There is no reason to be kind to them. Unless, of course, we kill them with “kindness.” So long as they die.

The Robot Wars May Already be Over

22 Thursday Feb 2018

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Sun Tzu famously said, “Every battle is won before it’s ever fought.” Few would dispute the general.

And so it may be that the robot wars, not quite yet underway, may already be decided. Let’s hope there is a robot exception to the general martial rule.

When I was a child there was a comic book, which I sometimes read, called Magnus, Robot Fighter. Titular character Magnus – you guessed it – fought robots, in the 41st century. It was harmless fun, then.

Now we know the timing was about 2,000 years off. Word came the other day that one of Boston Dynamic’s DARPA darlings has been redesigned to fight off pesky humans. In a test the dog-like bot battled a man for entry through a door and won. The man was unarmed and was likely no Magnus. That was yesterday.

Today a scientist warns near future bots will need special control chips in order to prevent them from wantonly murdering people, door disputes or not. Maybe it’ll be like psych meds for droids. So encouraging.

The US physicist outlined the evolution of robots in future, but it’s absolutely terrifying.

He believes robots will eventually become so advanced they run the risk of replacing the human race.

And to stop them having “murderous thoughts” before killing us, humans will need to act fast and chip them with preventive technology.

Okay, my sources are The Star and a defunct 70’s comic book. But one can see where this is going.

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Magnus, Gold Key.

Bolt Out of the Blue

13 Saturday Jan 2018

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This progresses faster than expected. GM begins canning the controls, not next decade, but next year.

Next year, General Motors Co. will no longer need an engineer in the front seat babysitting the robot brain that controls its self-driving Chevrolet Bolt. The steering wheel and pedals will be gone, giving total control to the machine.

When GM starts testing its autonomous electric sedan in San Francisco ride-sharing fleets, it’ll likely be the first production-ready car on the roads without the tools to let a human assume control. The announcement Friday is the first sign from a major carmaker that engineers have enough confidence in self-driving cars to let them truly go it alone.

“What’s really special about this is if you look back 20 years from now, it’s the first car without a steering wheel and pedals,” said Kyle Vogt, chief executive officer of Cruise Automation, the San Francisco-based unit developing the software for GM’s self-driving cars.

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I’ll take Level 0. Bloomberg.

From observing the way American’s absentmindedly enter freeways, one would already suspect the cars lack pedals and steering wheels. For many the robot driver will be a probable improvement.

Y’all have fun with that…

I’ve Had It! Perrin is Going to Build the Damn Flying Car!

14 Thursday Dec 2017

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Okay. Here we go again with the flying car thing. Soon. Next year. Next spring, they say.

Samson Motors has announced the Switchblade is ready for launch in spring 2018.

And more than 240 people have already reserved a model from the Oregon-based company.

The two-seater vehicle has extendable wings and a retractable tail that fold out.

It will have a cruising altitude of 13,000 feet and will reach speeds of 200mph in the air and 100mph on the ground.

The mind boggling creation is 5.1m in ground mode – the same length as the standard Mercedes-Benz S-Class – and would expand to 6.2m in the air when the tail is extended.

Call me a skeptic, but I’m a little skeptical here. Maybe it’s the 25 years of waiting and listening to ever-nebulous promises. Jades a man. Anyway, maybe this Sampson has it in the bag air wind-tunnel.

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Sampson/The Sun.

200 MPH at 1-3-0, eh. The thing is certainly plausible, no doubts about that. It’s just the timing. Spring of 2018? Do they really mean 2023? 2028? Never?

I’m curious. How many of the 240 reserve buyers requested a test flight? You ever buy a plane or a car without flying/driving it first? Do they even have a test model? Simulator? I’ll warrant the collective answer is “no.”

As I’ve said before, I’ll believe it when I fly it. Until then … wait … then is only until next Spring. Let’s give them through the end of the season. Heck with it, I’ll just call it a July 1, 2018 delivery. Then we’ll see. Maybe I’ll do a YT video of me on a test run (or more likely of me listening to excuses and promises on the phone). We’ll see.

In the meantime, I am proud to tentatively announce that I will SOON develop, release, and market a flying car of my own (name yet to be determined). More on that later. For now, just know that it’s going to be nuclear powered, capable of Mach 1+ while carrying up to 8 passengers, and may be exoatmospheric. Price, like the name, to be determined – she’ll be worth the money, trust you me. Expect production to commence no later than the third quarter of 2138 at the latest.

Don’t Worry, Buy a Tesla!

27 Monday Nov 2017

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Mr. Musk sees a statistically unpleasant outcome from the robot wars:

Elon Musk has been very vocal about his concerns over artificial intelligence, and now the Tesla and SpaceX CEO has quantified his worries.

In a recent talk, Musk claimed that efforts to make AI safe only have ‘a five to 10 per cent chance of success.’

The warning comes shortly after Musk claimed that regulation of artificial intelligence was drastically needed because it’s a ‘fundamental risk to the existence of human civilisation.’

Of course, of course – regulation always fixes everything. Trust in the government. See their shining work in eradicating: war, poverty, drugs, terrorism, obesity, etc.

In the meantime, please by a Tesla…

OR!

Buy a FLYING CAR!!!!!

Available in 2020! (2020 in Flying Car advertising talk translates to 2220 in actual time…).

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Hanna Barbera.

Closing the Door on Killer Robots

13 Monday Nov 2017

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That’s the Journal’s survival solution: just close the door.

Robots may enslave us all someday. In the meantime, if one of them goes berserk, here’s a useful tactic: Shut the door behind you.

One after another, robots in a government-sponsored contest were stumped by an unlocked door that blocked their path at an outdoor obstacle course. One bipedal machine managed to wrap a claw around the door handle and open it but was flummoxed by a breeze that kept blowing the door shut before it could pass through.

…

 

There are, now, plenty of machines that could simple roll or blast through the door. And the drawing board is filled with many that don’t walk, crawl, or roll anyway. The most terrifying of the lot may be a far cry from the hunter-killers of sci-fi infamy. Imagine a plague of robo insects or viruses.

And the time to imagine (and ACT) is now, says the Campaign to Stop Killer Robots (where do I join?).

Watch this:

Video by Guardian News/YouTube.

The movie portrays a brutal future. A military firm unveils a tiny drone that hunts and kills with ruthless efficiency. But when the technology falls into the wrong hands, no one is safe. Politicians are cut down in broad daylight. The machines descend on a lecture hall and spot activists, who are swiftly dispatched with an explosive to the head.

The short, disturbing film is the latest attempt by campaigners and concerned scientists to highlight the dangers of developing autonomous weapons that can find, track and fire on targets without human supervision. They warn that a preemptive ban on the technology is urgently needed to prevent terrible new weapons of mass destruction.

Stuart Russell, a leading AI scientist at the University of California in Berkeley, and others will show the film on Monday during an event at the United Nations Convention on Conventional Weapons hosted by the Campaign to Stop Killer Robots. The manufacture and use of autonomous weapons, such as drones, tanks and automated machine guns, would be devastating for human security and freedom, and the window to halt their development is closing fast, Russell warned.

“The technology illustrated in the film is simply an integration of existing capabilities. It is not science fiction. In fact, it is easier to achieve than self-driving cars, which require far higher standards of performance,” Russell said.

It all started in 1979 when an Ohio vending machine “accidentally” fell over on a man, crushing him. Yesterday it was soda drinkers. Tomorrow it could be anyone, or everyone.

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And you thought the student loans were a problem.