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Maybe not my best column…

Be Mo Smarter, Don’t Drink Da Warter

I wanted to see if the conspiracy theory theme from last week would still hold warter. Um, water. I also needed something quick as your CFF National Affairs Writer has felt better…

Another “conspiracy theory” of which you might have heard: some people have suggested that fluoridated water is bad for health. They’ve been ridiculed for that. Why? Who? How? Huh? Fluoride is essentially negatively-charged Fluorine (F, Z 9). The latter element is an extremely dangerous and corrosive oxidizer. The former anion is considerably less toxic but still comes with a maximum safe human daily allowance (10 mg). So far, so … yeah.

(Realtor or Zillow or Something)

Various municipalities add a variety of the less toxic stuff, in even much less toxic form, via either sodium fluoride or sodium monofluorophosphate, to tap water supplies. The effect, convention holds, is that this protects our teeth. There are admitted minor problems, but the net result is positive – unless you’re one of those theorists who maintain the stuff is still dangerous no matter how you compound it. Now, the theorists have a little more ammunition.

A NEW STUDY!, as heralded in The Daily Beast, finds that fluoridated water, consumed by expecting mothers, lowers the IQs of the expected chillins. The Beast story is good, pointing to some of the industry hypocrisy (in JAMA and elsewhere) as well as noting that additional studies confirmed the statistical veracity of the matter. However, this being the postmodern era, they cited the study itself indirectly through a Twitter link. I’ll give it to ya straight:

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