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I misunderstood a story at the Mirror. It seems that, as from a horror film, an unstoppable black slime is slowly creeping and oozing all over buildings and monuments in the Imperial Capital. Naturally, I assumed they meant the government itself. Nope.

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The Blob, 1958.

The slime, a black powdery substance, is just an air-fed micro-organism of some sort. I don’t think it’s toxic or, if it is, it has to be the least toxic thing in that town. Still, the Uruks complain that it is graying the appearance of many a white marble facade.

‘It’s called slime, but when you touch it, it’s dry; it doesn’t come off on your fingers,’ noted CBS News’ Mark Albert when he visited the area.

Because of its dryness, it’s even more difficult to clean off, said Mike Litterst of the National Park Service.

All biofilm, which is a colony of microscopic organisms, really needs to grow is nutrients and a surface such as stone. Many famous monuments all over the world have the same issue.

Rain can cause pits to form in smooth stone surfaces over time, creating the perfect petrie dish for the slime.

But getting rid of it isn’t as easy as soap and water.

Wars everywhere, economic oblivion, an invasion, and utter decay of nearly everything civic or good and all they care about is scrubbing some microbes. That should tell you where the government’s priorities are. They’re serious too – they’ve sought help from scientists the world over.

I have an easy fix. My solution will surely dry up, burn up the powder while getting rid of the other slime too. I recommend fire. Lots and lots of fire.

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