I’m not trying to inundate the web with posts but I feel like ramblin good today.  This one is happier than the last.  As some of you know I have recently embarked on a great weight loss adventure.  As of the last time I checked I am down 38 pounds!  What a loser!  That puts me at a solid 200.  I seem to have plateaued there for the time being – for good reasons, as follows.

This is more than a diet.  I have made a great life change.  Many have been the changes in my life in the past year or two.  Many of those were not so pleasant.  Perhaps out of depression or anxiety I put on a few pounds I really didn’t need.  Then, last fall, I suddenly began to loss some of them.  For no conscious reason I began to eat less.  Oddly, eating more than you need to adds extra pounds.  Once my pants began to loosen up I decided to formally have at it.  In addition to lowering my daily caloric intake, I also changed some of those calories.  Primarily I cut out carbohydrates (except my beloved dark ale) and processed junk food (that’s the majority of the Amerikan diet nowadays). 

By early December I had lost 20 to 25 pounds.  Then, as if I planned it, they opened the Evans Fitness Center (EFC).  Visit them virtually: http://www.evansfitnessclub.com/.  If you are in the Augusta area go in person.  The website does not do the place justice. 

Many, many, many years ago, in another century in fact, i was in excellent physical shape.  Then I stopped almost all activity and began the transformation into a typical Amerikan slob.  I have reversed the slide and I intend to never go back.

Now things are a little different.  I’m not 21 anymore – not that you know, right girls?  Right?…  Hmmm.  So, I did a free trial at EFC and was hooked.  They have a basis economy plan which even a hobo like me can afford.  I started off with weights, those heavy iron things with which I was once so familiar.  I had forgotten most of what I knew about working out.  EFC has so many different areas and types of equipment that I had to relearn and retrain myself.  It happened fast.

This time around I took it slow and light.  No more 400 pound bench presses or 600 pounds squats for me.  No more squats, period.  As it turns out, such massive weights are beyond my current capabilities.  Fat makes you weak, Amerika.  However, I have found that I do better with lower weights and more reps of them.  “Reps” means repetitions or how many times one lifts the weight in sequence.  As I am given to “bulk up” rather fast due to genetics or something (Daddy was a record-setting power-lifter) I have had to carefully watch to ensure I do not overdo anything.  Getting to heavy to fast has been my weakness in my previous attempts to get fit.  Eventually I hurt myself and swear off the gym. 

As is I am quite happy with my progress.  I have even incorporated a cardiovascular program into my routine.  Typically, I hit the old elliptical machine for 20 to 30 minutes after my weight session.  Once I hit 200 pounds I think the good muscle I gained began to offset the useless fat I lost.  Fortunately, for me I still have plenty of fat to burn!  I’m aiming for 190ish.  A good weight for my frame I think.  It’s all about aesthetics … and how the clothes fit.  My fat pants fell off even with a belt so I got rid of them.  Now my new pants are getting loose.  I may be close to 7 or so inches off my waist. 

In addition to looking good I also feel a hell of a lot better.  Last week, due to the untimely arrival of spring in Georgia, I felt compelled to de-thatch and mow the front lawn.  Once I had raked half of it I stopped for a second.  Something was missing.  I wasn’t sweating or out of breath.  Fat makes you sweat and drains your lungs.  I sleep better too.  I go to bed earlier and wake up feeling like I actually slept.  My beautiful queen says I have ceased to snore.  Fat makes you snore. 

Eating less and better, weight training, moving around, sleeping.  What else has changed???  I had to change my FB profile pic to one of Arnold in his heyday.  I drink more water and I breathe deeper.  I also don’t worry about things they way I used to – differently perhaps.  Some of this will be detailed in The Time Given.  Pay off some of the credit card now.

EFC offers some amenities which I never thought to try before.  They have not one, but two, inversion tables.  While looking like a medieval torture device, an inversion table is actually the greatest invention in human history.  I moved the air conditioner to number two, the shotgun to three, etc.  Sorry, Mr. Carrier, you’ve been bested.  One reclines on the table and locks one’s feet into the contraption at the bottom.  Then with the flick of a switch an electric motor rotates you back and down – fully upside down if you like.  That’s what I do.  At full rotation the table is actually in a reverse incline of 5 to 10 degrees ( I have not measured exactly).  What that means is that you, me in this case, get to freely hang upside down.  The foot device is a wee bit uncomfortable the first few times and those times may cause a little dizziness. 

All that hanging around (yuck yuck) performs a miracle on the whole body, in particular the spine and joints.  Five minutes upside-down is like a visit to the chiropractor followed by a massage and a shot of lidocaine.  Really.  I always makes sure to invert at the very end of any workout.  Once righted I feel right as rain.  I may have to steal one of these machines for home use.  Bolt em down or lose one, EFC.

I also, time permitting, enjoy a short sit in the sauna or steam room.  After hanging around this loosens joints and muscles and sweats out evil mojo.  A Scottish shower later and I feel like I am 21 again.  Fat makes you age, Amerika.

There is a distinct downside – two parts.  First, the hour or two spent in the gym is time lost on not sleeping well, snoring, worrying, or being a blob.  Second, I am slightly unnerved by all of the women who constantly ogle me at EFC and elsewhere.  Please be polite, ladies.

As for you, comrades – get out there and get fit!  You may never look as good as me, but you’ll feel a whole lot better.  By the way, how much ya bench?!