Cometh the Great Fifty-Year Perfumed Prince Pedo File Mortgage (And Other Pre-Thanksgiving Notions)

 

Howdy, comrades! I’m running this one well in advance of Big Bird Parade Day, as I might be otherwise unavailable later this month. (Elon has appointed me Special Ambassador to Mars!) No, seriously, I’m up to my eyeballs in literary matters.

Instead of pardoning a turkey this year, fake president Trumpstein chose to forgive a velociraptor, Supreme Leader Satanyahoo.

Fretting about Zohran Mamdani? Don’t. I imagine by this time next year, even the most liberal of Noo Yawkers will regret “voting” for him about as much as some of you regret “voting” for Trumpstein. 

The rumored $2,000 “Tariff Dividends” can only mean one thing. Yes, the banks need another small, multi-trillion-dollar bailout. If so, then it’s already a done deal.

The sweetest-smelling terrorist! Syrian al-CIA-da henchman and self-appointed president, Muhammad Al-Jawlani, went from a $10 million wanted poster to being sprayed with perfume in the Oval Office. Kids, if you work hard enough, anything is possible.

Speaking of kids, it seems the Trumpstein may not have been entirely honest about those Epstein files. Well, such happens when your country is operated by and for satanic pedos. You’ll have to vote much, much harder next time.

With Russia building Star Trek weapons, China being too big and rich, and Iran cranking out missiles like there’s no tomorrow, tomorrow’s splendid little war may have to be contained to Venezuela. But who knows? Maybe the Ford is just staggering and tripping around the Caribbean in search of more fishing boats to bomb.

Think mass financialization can’t get any worse? Think again. Our beloved Trumpstein has proposed the new FIFTY-YEAR MORTGAGE! It turns out that MAGA just means eternal peonage. If this happens, then the price of the average new house will probably soar to around $2 million. Those who still have jobs will likely find their housing-indexed purchasing power down by 2,500% since 1950. Here’s a simple graph that shows what the existing super usury has done to home ownership rates among the young and married since 1950.

(Vox Popoli.)

Oddly, or not, that seventy-five-year range coincides with America’s era of blessing “Israel.” Amazing how God has blessed Americans in return, eh? The graph for Posterity Americans as a percentage of the whole U.S. population would look about the same. As would a graph of children per family. As would a graph of the value of the Dollar. As would a graph of average IQs. As would … get it?

And what a blasphemous number! Those who’ve ever read the Bible know that debts are supposed to be forgiven every seven years. And, following the seventh cycle of seven years, during the fiftieth year, the entire socio-economic order must be reset. Given the ways of Clown World, maybe now adjustable interest rates will jump every seven years and, during the fiftieth, the entire thing will burn to the ground. 

The other night, evidently, the sky turned red over a vast area. Perhaps it was, as billed, a simple, if extreme, solar phenomenon. Or it could be that Someone was sending us a little sign of His displeasure. If so, that means He still cares, which is something to be thankful for.

Deo vindice.